An 80 year old man went into the confessional and told the priest the following:
"Father, I am an 80 year old man, I'm married, I have 4 children and 11 grandchildren. Last night I strayed and had an affair with two 18 year old girls. We partied and made love all night long."
The priest said, "My son, when was the last time you were at confession?"
The old man said, "I have never been to confession, I'm Jewish."
The priest said, "Then why are you here telling me this?"
The old man said, "Father, I'm telling everyone!"